Sunday, 2 January 2011


I am in MCC New York, Manhattan Correction Center...It's not the worst jail in the world.
The way it is set up, it's more akin to a mental hospital. There are plenty of mental people in here too.
 It is a Federal Correctional Facility. The Feds. A Federal crime..u get me.
 There is another Federal Correctional Center in New York...Brooklyn. MBC. The fucking lions den. It is known for being extremely violent, off key, and generally if you're going there you better prepare to fight/stab/rob/kill/maim/extort/do whatever you have to do to survive. Seriously, the place is fucking notorious..
 I wake up this morning, and am told by Sha that the CO (correctional Officer) has told me i have court today and need to get ready..which is strange as i know i don't have court for three months (FUCKING LONG, YOU FUCKING PRICKS) but whatever, i start getting dressed..Then the CO comes to the cell
"Guvercin, pack up"
"Pack up you're going to Brooklyn"
:O Welcome to DiariaShittypantsville Tennesse..
 I ask him many times if he might be mistaken, he assures me he isn't and that i need to get all my 'posessions' together, pronto. FUCK. Sha comes back to the cell, and looks very very sad. He can't believe i am going, and helps me get my shit together..I have people from all over the unit coming over to the cell to talk to me..
"DAMN Timdog, that place is fucking ruthless"
"Shit man, the guys in there would cut your face up for jokes"
"Gangs in there will get points for cutting a dude like you"
"You're going to the bigtime kid, you better get your shank ready"
:O fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck
 So i pack up everything, say my goodbyes to all my freinds and pass out my email adress/contact details..i feel fucking sick, i know were i am going, and how fucking fucking fucking bad it is...
 I get to the door, bag packed, all ready to go..there is about 50 dudes ready to see me off, all telling me i will be ok as long as i keep to myself, fight when i need to fight, stab when i need to stab etc..even the head of the Bloods is giving me advice
"Just go ruthless Timdog"
 Sha comes and gives me a hug, and says a little speach about how much of a nice guy i am and how much everyone will miss me, then says
"On behalf of everyone here, i'd like to let you know..."
unfolds a piece of paper that just says 'PUNKD' on it
 The WHOLE fucking unit erupts in laughter, people are rolling around on the floor crying, punching the walls, screaming, laughing at the top of their lungs....MOTHERFUCKERS!!! even the fucking PRISON OFFICER was in on the joke!! PRICKS!
Time to change my shitty pants..

1 comment: