Monday, 27 December 2010

The unit

My Unit. Nine north. 9N. The shithole. Whatever you want to call it..
 It is comprised of 6 tiers, split into three, one upstairs one downstairs. Each tier has a completely different vibe, and different people on them. You have A tier, which is mostly geeky type neeks and random heads all thrown together..Everyone is pretty quiet, doesn't get loud, it's the happy tier :)
 next you got the C and D tiers, which are the spannish tiers..Nearly everyone on their is spanish/dominican/puerto rican, and they keep to themselves and generally have each others backs. Its pretty loud down their, people singing and dancing and shit most of the day.
 E tier is just a load of random heads all thrown together, people that are just on their own ting, or recluses that don't wanna socialise with the rest of the population. Fair play to them to be frank, bare pricks up in here.
 Underneath E you have F tier..which is comprised of older dudes and a lof of Muslim guys too. It's very chilled down there, no one is loud, and most of the time the tier has next to no one on it..pure ghost tier!
 Lastly you have my tier..B tier..the super rowdy tier. There is always people shouting, playing cards, making food, singing, spitting bars, dancing, all kinds of fuckries..It's mostly black dudes on the tier, apart from me and two spanish guys. If someone is going to go down, it's usually on my tier..and even more likely, in front of my cell (or in my bloody cell).
 There's many characters on the unit who i have interactions with on a daily basis..Whether it's O, a cold blooded killer who has many a body on the street, to Shorty, who does everyones laundry..he comes up to me about 7 times a day telling me i'm a real n****r and shaking my hand..He cleans my clothes really good too. If he doesn't like you, your clothes will just get thrown in the mop bucket and swished around in gob..
 Every morning i am woken up by the same fuckrie. The dude i mentioned who is the (totally OG) barber here, is always on a prank flex. The same prank, every morning. He sneaks down onto our unit and smashes (always random) one of the doors as hard as possible with the sounds like a fuckign gunshot going off...and is always accompanied by spanish dudes screaming with laughter. I have no idea why he does this
 The number one thing that goes down on my tier is mans playing cards. Spades. Arguing. All fucking day long, always arguing, always screaming and shouting about who cheated when (THEY ARE ALL CHEATING ALL OF THE TIME) it's so retarded..whenever they get up to leave there are always cards were they were sitting, and cards on the floor that they were hiding underneath their feet..They don't even bet on this game either...just for example, earlier today i'm getting my sketch on, and doing it very it all errupts. This dude just stands up screaming "yeah n****r yeah n****r" and starts punching the door next to him for about 40 seconds, pure combos on this door while screaming "WHAT NOW N****R" again and again and again..until the guard comes down shouting "what the FUCK are you doing!?!?"
 Swain replies "You n****rs is trash son, you's bumjuice"
 We can't get porn magazines in here. For some reason, in the state, you can get full hardcore porn whatever the fuck you like. But in the state they don't let you. Why they do this is beyond people have to put up with Big booty magazines, or 'hip hop' magazines as they're called..full of moronic girls posing on the roofs of project buildings, with INSANELY big asses..The interviews are amazing. Most of these chicks think they're going to be actresses and go into movies from doing these photoshoots, bless :D
 One dude i had the pleasure of going to court with, was telling me how in the state he had bare issues of buttman magazine, and had a 'sex tape'. Which basically meant a casette tape that had the audio of a porno on it, and he would listen to that while dunnin the dance. Same dude took a shit in the bull pen while there was about 10 of us sitting right next to him.

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