Sunday 12 December 2010

daily routines and bullshit

Federal Jail is fucking boring. Seriously, excruciatingly mindnumbingly boring. Which leads to the most stupidly moronic conversations..I just spent the last hour listening to two guys arguing whether a rat could climb out of your toilet..one was convinced that rats are basically squirells, and can jump 6 foot in the air, the other claimed he used to be a plumber, and that a rat couldn't climb out the toilet because of the U bend or something..riveting stuff
 Being in here is extremely similar to being in High school. You have different cliques, nerds, bullies, outcasts, weirdos, perverts and so on...Just like the all boys high school i went to, as there are no girls here, people are acting crazy and doing the stupidest shit imaginable, just for jokes.
 Our timetable..
Every morning, at around the 6 o clock hour, you get woken up for breakfast (or 'CHOW'). This usually consists of something really fucking dry like shitty cereal, and a piece of cake that has had the flavour industrially sucked out of it. After a few hours, at around 10am, you are locked in the cell for the 10 o clock count (to make sure no one is trying to escape) and then let out around 1130 for lunch. After lunch, you are free to doss around all day up until about 330, when you ass gets locked up again..come around 5ish, it's dinner time...more hours and hours to waste until 830, locked back up, then let out at 930 for around an hour, to call loved ones and what not, then they lock you up again. Repeat that every fucking day and you have an idea of what my life mostly consists of at the moment. It's fascinating stuff right?
 Most meals taste like fucking dogshit. I wouldn't be suprised if i found a pube or a piece of albanian sheep dogs dick contained in these amazing gourmet sick bags they call chow. You have the rare day when we are given something half edible, like a donkey dick in a bun, but most days it's what you would imagine the food to be like in the midnight express jail..apart from there isn't any raki to knock it back, or hash.
 But
Once or twice a week, it's Chicken day :D This day is like christmas for the inmates in here, apart from there are no gifts given out, only crappy pieces of 'fried chicken'. But to the inmates of MCC, they act like this chicken has been marinated in crack..To say these brares are catting for this shit is an understatement..So much so...
 When it's chicken day, this place get's locked the fuck DOWN. They lock everyone in their cells when serving the chicken out, in fear of some major fuckries going down. An somewhere along the way, it usually does..someone gets robbed, someone gets slapped up for their chicken, always something stupid.
 For the first two months, i didn't eat my chicken...i sold it. For a lot of goods, people were paying through the nose for this shit, no jokes. But i got tired of all these chicken addicts coming up to me, EVERY SINGLE DAY,
"Hey english, can i buy your chicken next week?"
no
"Hey cracker, gimme your chicken next week"
fuck you
 So i started eating the chicken myself, just to get mans to back the fuck off...and it tasted like albanian sheep dogs dick with woucester sauce
The only thing that actually breaks the week apart, is you get mail Monday to Friday.
Before coming in here, i hadn't written a letter in fucking YEARS..My hand writing was beyond retarded, it looked like steven hawkins trying to bust a handstyle with a broken wrist. Coming in here, i see things differently. Emails are nice, it's cool to instantly comunicate with someone on the other side of the planet, but it's very unpersonal. Writing and recieving letters, is one of the most important things that keeps me going in here. To get a letter from someone, that is hand written, means so much more than ten bzillion emails. You know that person has sat down and taken the time out of their day to write to you, you can almost imagine them writing it. If anyone would like to write to me, i would more than appreciate it, whether i know you or not. Just make sure there is a return address..pictures, sketches, anything..it reminds me that there is a world of people out there, and i'm not alone in all this..Which is very easy to forget, especially everytime i read my paperwork and see
"Timothy G******* vs The United States of America"..fat mugs.
Holla at me

No comments:

Post a Comment