I'm venting.

It's easy to let issues hold you back in life.

There's always something to pull out of the back
of excuses we all carry around with is.

Whether it's something from your past,
present or future, anything can be used as
reasoning for a lack of motivation or
stagnation in one's path through life.

We even steal other people's excuses for
our own lack of progress or feelings of deep
inadequecy of where we are and what we're
doing in life, our 'achievements', how happy
we are and how we then proceed to treat
the people around us each day..

"this person did this"

"i can't because of"

"Yeah but"

Instead of taking a risk,
putting yourself out there and attempting
something that could quite possibly result
in public failure or ridicule, it's always easier,
safer and more comfortable to just stick to
what's familiar and in your immediate
comfort zone..

The problem is..

You know you deserve better.

Life is not about comfort or familiarity,
if it was, you'd live your whole life at your
parents yard getting waiting on hand
and food, eating nice munch and generally
doing fuck all..

But you don't..

As i squint at a dusty sprinkler that's hanging
in the middle of this dark room, i think back to
my life in the town and how i felt on a day to day
basis compared to how i think and feel now..

A lot of the excuses i employed in the street
and my reasoning for a lot of my accomplishments,
hopes and dreams that never came to fruition..

Looking back..

Most of them where pure bullshit.

In the cold light of my jail cell,
it's easy to see through most of my lifes pointless
cycles of inability, stagnation, the reasons that stopped
i LET stop me achieving that simple goal that is shared
by billions of people across the planet..

Which is simply to lead a happy life.

We all have our own thoughts and ideas concerning what
will actually propel us to this goal..

Which is a beautiful thing.

Variety.

:)

But overall this is a goal that everybody deserves,
some of us have already achieved it and are leading
an existence that is envied by many..

I'm not one of them.

But i think i might be finally heading in the right direction?

Personally i don't think that money or status will get me there,
i'm sure the majority of happy people in this world are actually
living on a very modest budget and are not in the limelight,
i think it's down to your viewpoint on life and an understanding
of your own existence.

As i sit here in the dark,
blinking profusely, using my tired eyes to
scan the room trying to find an object that
describing might pad this piece of writing out
a little..

I'm thinking about the people outside..

In a world of opportunities..

Who are not happy and are letting themselves go
through their time on this earth being told or directed,
by a meaningless array of excuses and reasons,
not to persure the life that they deserve.

If you have an itching feeling that something isn't right
in your life, that you are stuck in a dead end job, relationship, if you
are unhappy about where you are living or the people who you are
surrounded by on a daily basis..

Well..

You owe it to yourself to do something about it.

Look for a new job.

Enroll in University/college.

Go to somewhere new.

Meet some new people.

Life is very short..

And only a crazy person repeats
the same behaviour expecting different results..

On that note..

I'm brushing my teeth an going to bed.

I've been up since 6am and i'm very tired..