the money team

Right now..

I'm back on my bullshit..

Tonight i put on the suit..

An in the space of an hour and twenty minutes..

Knocked out 1200 calories on the step machine.

:D

I got a new technique to get my cardio/breathing up to scratch,
each time i hit 250 calories i suck (SHUT up you MUG) on one of
them Jolly Ranger sweets (NOT candy) as then I'm only breathing
out my nose and although extremely difficult..

I've been TOLD this is supposed to be good.

Anyways that was earlier..

When i finished i cleaned the machine (I'm the only one that does)
an after wiping the machine down i got in line for the shower..

Someone was already in there so i did the usual..

"YO Lemme get AFTER you"

"WHO DAT!? TIMDIZZLE!?"

"YEAH! LEMME GET AFTER YOU!!"

"YOU AIN'T GOTTA WAIT MA N****R!! COME THE FUCK IN!!"

:/

"AIGHT!! YOU BETTER FUCKIN' FACE THE WALL AN BRACE YOURSELF!!
MOTHERFUCKIN' RETARD!!"

"AAA-HAHA!!"

Idiot.

As i walked away..

Some elderly Spanish dude come waddling out of his room,
in just a pair of draws an in his shaky hand is a bar of soap,
with his other hand he performs the commonly known gesture of,

'You are after me'

**Using both index fingers and rotating them in a circular motion,
one way for saying you are after them another for they are after you**

He was never in line for the shower..

:/

But despite me being soaking wet with sweat..

I KNOW he's either not going to understand me if i explain
or he's going to pretend not to understand what I'm saying..

Plus he's REAL old..

So i just give him a thumbs up.

An he in return gives me a big toothless grin..

I go make an apple fruit salad while i wait..

While I'm doing so..

I hear a big stomping sound and notice
a huge pair of feet coming down the stairs..

Now i have company..

"Yo my n****r i be so BORED up in this BITCH!!"

I stop peeling and stare at him for a few moments..

"How long you been down?"

He looks up to the ceiling and lops his head to one side..

"Shit..erm..FUCK..EIGHT MONTHS!!"

I DON'T pick up a plastic knife as i DON'T own one..

:/

An continue peeling my apples..

"Imagine how bored you're gonna feel after twenty five months.."

I was tempted to tell him he still smelt like pussy.

This is a common jailhouse expression for people
who have either just come in from the street..

Or an individual that don't have 'that much' time in..

I chose not to.

Not only was the dude big enough to EASILY,
say if he either didn't find my joke funny or didn't understand it's meaning,
wash me the FUCK UP an smack me of EVERY surface in the immediate area..

But..

He ain't actually ON pussy.

He's on dick..

AN ball's..

Before you start worrying though..

He doesn't like White meat.

So we're all good..